Ever heard the term, "fake it till you make it"? If not, there ya go…this is my mantra.
I remember in school hearing about self-fulfilling prophecies and that if you truly believe something will happen then it will. So, with that in mind, I thought…if I constantly act like I have confidence I eventually will…right?
I grew up in a military household and moved a lot forcing me to start over every couple of years. As a heavy girl I lacked confidence to do anything, especially by myself. Constant fear and belief that all eyes were on me, and everyone was judging me was an everyday battle and kept me from putting myself out there. I started to add this mantra and mindset to every aspect of my life. What I learned was that I was far more concerned about myself than others were. I learned that if you act with confidence, even if it is feigned, no one questions you. Try it…next time you walk into a new situation, hold your head high, make eye contact, smile and act like you own the place. Now, your knees might be knocking and your palms sweating, but no one will question you, in fact they will look to you and wish they knew as much about the situation as you do.
Note: Make sure you are confident and not cocky…that could go badly.
Part 2 of this mantra/philosophy is to "dress the part". You cannot act like you own the building if you show up in jorts and flip flops. Put your best foot forward always, there is no crime in being overdressed. Dressing well has a direct impact on how you feel about yourself and about the confidence you have in situations.
I have used this mantra with body images, dance lessons, family reunions, life lessons, school, work, and challenges I have faced in life. It works.
Overtime with practice you will eventually forget that you are faking it and all of a sudden you will have genuine confidence in yourself. What a cool moment. I hope everyone is able to find their confidence, regardless of where you are with your personal goals, self-pride is invaluable.
To help you remember these key ideas behind "fake it till you make it" I want you to remember two things my Mimi has always told me 1) "Never leave the house without color on your lips", and 2) "Knockers Up". Interoperate those however you want but I apply them as dress the part and carry yourself with confidence.